I get a lot of advice as a new mom. It varies widely, but one thing I hear from almost everyone is “enjoy this time.” Enjoy this time, because it goes so quickly. Enjoy this time, because things will change before you know it. Because it’s harder as they get older. It’s never as easy as it is now. I’ve kind of just brushed it off as hyperbole, and then this weekend I got an email update from Anna Kunnecke that really hit me.
I started getting Anna’s weekly emails a while back and I’ve enjoyed reading her messages about self-care, organization (one day…), and being kinder to yourself. This one, sent last Saturday, really resonated with me, and I wanted to share it with you.
Here’s just a blurb:
Whether you’re parenting or building a business or doing aerial yoga on that corporate ladder, nothing is more maddening than being told, “Ohhh, just wait, this is the easy part!” because nothing is the easy part when you’re in the thick of it.
It’s only later that we can look back nostalgically and say, “Oh that time when I was a broke beatnik artist bookstore clerk was so romantic….” because we’ve forgotten how terrifying it was and how bad so many things smelled back then.
We all get bigger. And braver. In fact, you do 47 things every day now that used to be mystifying and terrifying…without even thinking about them. Like walk. And drive. And make the can opener work. And open your own cheese string packages.
You can read the rest of her piece here.
The things you’re doing today, you couldn’t have imagined doing before you knew how. When I was in the throes of newbornhoodom (yes, that’s a thing), I mentioned to my cousin that I couldn’t believe she had done all I had to do every day, with TWINS. How did she and her husband manage to feed, change diapers, soothe, and figure out sleep schedules for two babies at the same time? I couldn’t even do it for one! And she just smiled and said, “I dunno, you just do it.” You figure it out as you go along. You grow as they grow.
When I was a pre-teen, the thought of driving a car seemed unfathomable to me. We lived in the country, and I wondered logistically how I could get a cab to come and pick me up and take me everywhere I needed to go. Driving a car was scary, until I took Driver’s Ed and got behind the wheel. Then it wasn’t scary anymore.
Since before I can remember, the thought of birthing a baby terrified me. The pain, the mystery of what it would feel like or how it would even work (babies have shoulders!) turned my stomach in knots and I let that fear freeze me, decades before I even had the means to grow a family. When I actually needed to know what was coming, I took a class, I learned what to expect, and it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be.
You have the knowledge you need for today. And if you don’t, you will learn by the end of it. Don’t think too far ahead. Don’t let the fear of tomorrow ruin today. Enjoy this time, and let tomorrow take care of itself. You can do this.